Every day it’s the same: The same archipelago of crumpled clothing. The same sodden towels in terrycloth dunes on the floor. The same crime scene splatter of Playmobil figurines and race cars. The same tacky blue swishes of Kids Crest on the white vanity. The same pee on the toilet seat. When I use my sons’ bathroom, I actually squat like I’m in a Starbuck's.